25 long distance date ideas for when you’re miles apart

What makes a long distance date work

A date is more than a call. It has a plan, a start and an end, and something you do together besides catching up. That’s the difference between a date and another “so, what’s new?”.

Pick one idea, put it in both calendars, and treat it like you would a date in person: dress up a bit, turn off the notifications, and don’t do the washing up halfway through.

Dates on a video call

1. 1Cook the same recipe at the same time, then eat together on camera.
2. 2Order each other a surprise takeaway.
3. 3Watch a film together: press play on three and keep the call open.
4. 4Start a book club for two, with one short book a month.
5. 5Take a virtual museum tour and each pick a favourite piece.
6. 6Make a playlist together and take turns explaining every song.
7. 7Dress up for dinner, even if it’s pasta.
8. 8Have a slow evening with candles, tea and nothing on the screen but each other.

Dates across time zones

When your evenings don’t line up, plan dates that don’t need you both awake at once.

1. 9Swap your day in photos: one every hour you’re awake.
2. 10Write each other a letter by post and open it on a call.
3. 11Answer the same daily question, and open the answers together.
4. 12Leave a voice note for the other’s morning.
5. 13Plan your next visit day by day, in a shared note.

Games to play together apart

A game gives you something to laugh about that isn’t your week. These work on a call, each of you on your own phone.

1. 14Play In Sync and see where you match on money, home and the future.
2. 15Play Know Me Better: answer for yourself, then guess their answer.
3. 16Take turns with would you rather questions until one of you gives in.
4. 17Do an online jigsaw or a crossword together.
5. 18Play a gentle round of truth or dare.
6. 19Have a quiz night for two, with a small bet on the result.

Dates out in your own cities

1. 20Walk at the same hour and send each other photos as you go.
2. 21Go to your favourite café and order what they would.
3. 22Watch the sunset where you are and send it, even if it’s hours apart.
4. 23Visit a bookshop and pick a book for each other.
5. 24Cook their favourite meal and send them a photo of the result.
6. 25Take the same online class at the same time: drawing, a language or yoga.

Questions to bring to the date

When the plan is done and you just want to talk, try these:

1. 26What’s the first thing we’ll do when we see each other?
2. 27If we could meet anywhere tomorrow, where would it be?
3. 28What would our perfect Sunday together look like?
4. 29What would you put in a care package for me?
5. 30What do you want our next visit to feel like?

Between dates

Dates work best on top of something small every day. A daily question you both answer keeps the in-between days from going quiet, so the date isn’t a week of catching up. In the Talk Deep app it’s called Connect: one question a day, answers open together at 8 pm, and a streak for the days in a row.